Fear invited you into my life the day my childhood was taken. How could I know at the age of five it was a lifetime commitment because you invaded my mind?
Your love so strong, your grip so tight, you were breathing for me as you blinded my sight. My fate now cinched because you kept me free from the dangers around me that brought me to my knees.
You whispered don’t speak and never to stray because I would not survive if you did not stay.
You took my voice and gave me yours, my life no longer mine because we are now conjoined. Together we will be till death do us part, our vows now sealed since you broke my heart.
My world on fire, I can see from afar, spiraling like a tornado that hit me so hard. Hiding and manipulation became my only goal. My motto, my song, was known to all.
I already ate
I did not purge
I have not fainted
I have not lost weight
An abusive relationship I never saw, you brainwashed my mind when you stole my soul. My body weak, my blood pressure low, my heart barely beating, and I had no control. My life never mine, and I asked you to go, you shook me violently, telling me “NO.”
You said you would let up if I lost more weight and as I disappeared your power dominated. You brought me to death’s door so many times and asked for forgiveness as I was losing my mind. My thoughts no longer clear I had to believe you had my best interest, so I was ready to please.
My team my lifeline rolled in like thunder striking you down as I was going under. Their wisdom and guidance sent me a rope bringing me back up and giving me hope.
I no longer trust the words that you say because I have no doubt you will take me away. The battles with you continue to show, but I have come to see that you never wanted to set me free. You warned me of danger; a reality unseen, your power once crippling, is slowly coming back to me.
The time has come for us to part ways; I want to survive without you by my side. You no longer control me, as much as you try, as I continue to trip, stumble, and fall; I will crawl until I can fly.
As you sit on my shoulder begging to come in, I whisper these words “I am the storm that put out the fire, and as I send you to hell, I need you to hear, I am stronger than you as I watch you disappear.”